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I felt alive, I guess. I want to getback to that," he said. "But... in the meantime, while I'm still lookingfor a job, if it'll make you happy, then yes. I can do the homemakerthing."Julia grinned. "That's fantastic, Eric. It means a lot," she said withenthusiasm. It was a start, she reasoned. Another barrier broken. Shedidn't expect him to agree with being a full-time homemaker immediatelybut he needed to hear it as something reasonable so she could steer himthere in time. She was one step closer to having him right where shewanted him.Eric took a deep breath and exhaled, blowing out some of the stress withit. He was relieved to find some common ground with Julia."See how much better things run with me in charge, Eric," Julia said witha smile.Eric gave her a shallow nod, more an acknowledgment than anything else."Good," she said, ignoring his lack of enthusiasm. "But, I don't want yougetting the wrong idea. Like I said before, everything is differentbetween us now. Agreeing to be a. She surprised me by offering to help, but it just made me feel worse, like our family was such a mess we needed my friend from school to get our things in order.If she was willing to help with chores, though, she had to like me, at least a little. If I could stay with her for the weekend, I might be able to avoid Clara. Sure, she would punish me for that in new year, but they’d always find something to punish me for, anyway. I didn’t want to feel unsafe in my own home, like she could come any time she wanted. It was one of the hardest things I had done, but I overcame my shyness and fear of rejection, and asked Fiona--begged, really--if I could come to visit her the next weekend. I was so afraid she’d show contempt or disapproval my hands were shaking.She said no. It was just as I feared. No-one would ever care about me.Sure, she had an excuse. Everyone had an excuse. Kira had asked her. Didn’t she know I needed her more? Didn’t she know it was an emergency? No, she didn’t know,.
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